At the beginning with you
by veronique2
Summary: the story takes place after the wrestling scene from the movie.


Title: At the beginning with you.1/1

Authors : veronique

Email address:kyomine2002yahoo.fr

Category:romance

Pairing: Alexander/Hephaistion teenage slash

Date:02/01/2005

Feedback: please, but if you don't like it, be constructive , I don't want to read sarcasm or snarks.

Archive: if you want I'm okay

Rating:nc 13

Disclaimer: I don't own them. They're characters belonging to Warner Brothers Pictures, to Oliver Stone, to my imagination, and to the ages. This is a work of a fan, done for no remuneration save the satisfaction of the work.

Special thanks to my beta dreamer46 .

Summary: Take place after the wrestling scene.

Warnings: I based my characters on my interpretation of the movie.  
It's a fanfiction based on the movie and the movie only.  
Particular warning for this fic: This fic is, like I said, based on  
the movie. I see Hephaistion as a strong character who possessed both  
good and  
bad qualities.  
My portrayal of him is not black and white, but gray. This is what I  
took from Oliver Stone's suggestions and his little glimpses. Remember it's a fiction and a  
fiction only.

Thanks for reading the warnings.

At The Beginning With You

Alexander couldn't sleep. He should have been asleep for two or three hours now. Instead his mind was obsessed by what happened today with Hephaistion. Nothing went like Alexander wanted it to. He was frustrated, and upset, each time he recalled the events of the day.

Alexander had noticed Hephaistion since the first day he joined them in Aristotle's class. He found Hephaistion extremely attractive, completely amazed by his blue eyes and his perfect body and beautiful face. The boy seemed smart too. During the class, Alexander was surprised to find himself staring at Hephaistion, without listening to what Aristotle was saying. He caught Hephaistion staring at him too but the boy quickly looked away from him when he was caught and acted like nothing had happened. Alexander was confident, when Hephaistion stared at him, he never turned his head away. He smiled at him, with what he knew to be his most beautiful smile . Hephaistion smiled back at him politely but it wasn't a smile that invited more.

Alexander wanted to talk to him, to know him better. He didn't know why but each time Hephaistion was around or close to him, his heart was beginning to beat a little faster.

Aristotle's class finished and Alexander, for the third day in a row, had not listened well. He was obsessed by the handsome teenager. Hephaistion seemed a quiet boy who didn't talk much with people, except with Aristotle after the class ended.

Alexander came back from his reveries when he spotted Hephaistion and Nearclus, who were talking and smiling at each other. Alexander felt suddenly incredibly upset. Why was Hephaistion talking with Nearclus? Why did he chose to talk to Nearclus? He felt insulted and angry. He had spent three days smiling at Hephaistion, looking at him with interest and had received almost nothing in return; and now it was Nearclus who had his favours.

As he saw Hephaistion leave Nearque, he rushed toward the boy.

"Hey Alexander" said the Nearclus with a smile as he saw Alexander coming to him.

"What you two were talking about?" Alexander asked a little rudely.

"Huh?" asked Nearclus confused.

"With the new boy, Hephaistion"

"Oh, well since, Aristotle assigned us as a pair to work on this herbalist project, we were talking about when we could meet to work together on it".

Alexander frowned. A homework given by Aristotle? Suddenly he heard a familiar voice called him. He looked in the direction of the voice and saw Cassander approach.

"So Alexander, when will you have free time to work on our project?" Cassander asked happily.

"Huh?" Alexander said.

"The herbalist project Aristotle assigned. You do remember he told me to work with you?" said Cassander in a confused tone.

"OH, yes! It was what I was talking with Nearclus, actually," said Alexander with confidence in front of the puzzled Nearclus.

Cassander smiled. 'Damn' thought Alexander, Hephaistion on his mind too much; he didn't even remember Aristotle assigning them that homework.

Later, in his room, Alexander was upset. Why didn't the Gods whisper to Aristotle to pair him with Hephaistion instead of Cassander? He sighed.

Alexander made up his mind, Hephaistion seemed shy and maybe he was just overwhelmed by the prince. Alexander had been used to people coming to him because they wanted to talk to him, be friends with him; and Alexander allowed it if it was done with respect.

It seemed with Hephaistion, he would have to do everything on his own. The smiles weren't enough. After all, Hephaistion was new and probably didn't know how to handle himself with a prince.

He decided that the next day, he would go and talk to him after the class.

So he did, when Aristotle told them class was done for the day. He walked straight to Hephaistion and called him to be sure Hephaistion would wait him.

They were in front of each other, and Alexander's heart was beating faster. The blue eyes were looking at him and he was glad he wasn't a person who blushed easily, because surely he would have been as red as a tomato.

At the moment when Alexander started speaking, Aristotle joined them.

"AH , Alexander, I need to talk you," he said. Aristotle looked at Hephaistion.

"You let us Hephaistion?" he asked and Hephaistion obeyed and left with a smile to Aristotle and Alexander.

Alexander thought he was cursed and Aristotle was the one who put the curse on him. He was frustrated and highly annoyed.

Aristotle asked Alexander to sit down.

"What's happening to you Alexander? For the last few days, your mind seems everywhere but on my lessons".

Of course Aristotle had noticed. Usually Alexander listened carefully and was quick to start a discussion when Aristotle asked it of his class.

Alexander didn't know how to answer. He couldn't say he only had eyes for the new boy and couldn't focus on anything else.

"I've watched you, Alexander, you pass more time staring at Hephaistion, than listening to me"

He had been caught by Aristotle. Not that he had been subtle in how he stared at the boy.

Alexander was searching for words but before he could speak, Aristotle continued because he guessed what was happening with Alexander and he didn't want to push the issue with the young prince.

"It's fine for today, Alexander, but be sure to be more attentive to my lesson tomorrow," he said with a small friendly laugh.

Alexander nodded. He knew also that he needed to focus on Aristotle's lesson, they were important. It was just that he had never felt so disturbed by a boy before. His heart and mind couldn't let go. He had never felt this way before.

The next day, when Alexander heard his wrestling teacher tell him he would wrestle with Hephaistion, he finally thought the Gods had taken pity on him and decided to give him the chance he had wanted for the last 5 days.

A wrestling match. It couldn't have been better. Alexander could touch Hephaistion, look at his pretty blue eyes and perfect face in a closer way. He was really happy. It was the perfect opportunity. He knew he was damn good at wrestling, after he had beaten Ptolemy, Cassander, and even Crateros. He told himself to be careful with Hephaistion, to not bruise his delicate skin too much.

Alexander grinned, already picturing himself asking Hephaistion if he had hurt him too much, telling him he was a good fighter to comfort his pride and proposing to take care of the little bruises himself to make amends. A wrestling match was something intimate, a very good opportunity.

They were now in front of each other. Alexander's heart was again jumping up and down. Hephaistion looked at him with great respect.

"Good luck" Alexander said to Hephaistion

"To the best" Hephaistion answered seriously.

Their teacher told them to start. They tackled each other and not even one minute later, Alexander was already eating dust. Hephaistion was strong. Alexander was surprised by his strength, had not guessed such strength could be hidden, under such grace and beauty.

Alexander tried to force Hephaistion to lose his balance, but it was extremely difficult. Finally Alexander succeeded and Hephaistion was the one on the floor. Unfortunately for Alexander, quickly Hephaistion was on top again, and for the second time, he was eating dust. Hephaistion pushed hard. Alexander began to be upset with the situation.

His eyes met Hephaistion's, who seemed very determined. Alexander felt a shiver in his spine. Hephaistion was challenging him roughly. Alexander received the message clearly. Alexander wasn't someone who would let him win, even if he had been attracted by Hephaistion. The wrestling turned into something harsh and serious. They fought like Lions. For the first time in his life, Alexander felt the real power of a fight, to want to win no matter what. They were two Titans and neither wanted to be defeated by the other.

Alexander felt rage. Hephaistion was controlling and calm. When their eyes met it was all about conquering and defeating the other. Alexander had never felt like this before. He was in trouble because no matter what he tried, Hephaistion was stronger. But he didn't want to give up and neither did Hephaistion.

Hephaistion was hurting him like no other had hurt him in wrestling. It was not better when the teacher told Alexander that he needed to get better; that a prince needed to show he could engage with his warriors.

Finally their teacher claimed Hephaistion the winner and congratulated him. Alexander was angry, he didn't want to accept defeat and he tried again to tackle Hephaistion But his teacher didn't allow it and told him he had to accept defeat. Alexander was panting, his flesh still hurting but it was nothing compared to his pride which was suffering even more.

Alexander looked at those blue eyes again, which were now far different from the icy blue colour he saw during the match. Those eyes had looked like deadly weapons. Now Hephaistion looked genuine and friendly again.

Alexander didn't noticed how stunned the other boys were. Hephaistion had won. They couldn't believe Hephaistion didn't let Alexander win in the end. Because they all did that. Alexander wasn't a bad wrestler but when they had the opportunity to beat him, they didn't. He was their prince.

Hephaistion was panting too. Alexander couldn't believe his ears when Hephaistion asked him if he would prefer that he had let him win.

Alexander's pride was hurt again. Of course he would have preferred to win because he felt his own authority being threatened in front of the others and because of what his teacher said to him. But to Hephaistion he only said that the next time he could beat him. Oh yes, he already wanted to train harder.

In his bed, Alexander recalled that moment endlessly. The truth was even with his pride hurt, he was more attracted to Hephaistion. Hephaistion had been honest with him in the fight. He didn't treat him like a prince and now Alexander could see the difference between his other wrestling matches and this one with Hephaistion.

Hephaistion had treated him like any other student; the fact that he was a prince hadn't mattered. Alexander wasn't angry anymore. On the contrary he wanted Hephaistion more. He seemed to love him more and his heart beat faster too.

He felt Hephaistion had awoken him totally. Alexander, for the first time, felt what Achilles must had felt when he was fighting. A real fight. Of course Alexander had also tasted bitter defeat. But he was glad he had - because now he was sure that to get what he really wanted - Fighting and Conquest - he had to became better, closer to perfect.

"Hephaistion" he whispered. He just loved to pronounce his name. Alexander wanted him more than ever, felt he needed him. He promised to himself it would be only a matter of time before the boy would be his. He couldn't explain it but he already felt he couldn't live without him.

That same night, Hephaistion couldn't sleep either. He had beaten his prince. Hephaistion didn't know if that was good or bad, but he did what his reason and heart told him to do.

Since he arrived, he had been obsessed by Alexander. He had never seen such a beautiful boy. He felt his heart beating faster each time the prince looked at him with his beautiful smile.

He tried his best to ignore the prince and not fall into the same pattern as the other boys. He didn't want Alexander to confuse him with them. He didn't want Alexander thinking he was interested only because he was the prince and future king.

Hephaistion had been obsessed by Alexander for 5 days now. But had tried his best to separate his heart's feeling and his reason.

Hephaistion didn't care about who Alexander really was. He corrected himself, in fact he did care about who Alexander really was - and this was exactly why he kept himself distant.

Most of all, he didn't want to be confused with those flattering boys who were always around Alexander. So he preferred to keep his emotions to himself, and remain silent because he felt attracted to Alexander, not to the prince.

When he was chosen to wrestle with Alexander, he decided to be honest. He could have let the prince win, but he didn't want to betray Alexander. If Alexander wasn't good enough, he had to know. Their fight had been intense. Hephaistion had loved the way Alexander fought against him. The rage and passion with which he fought. He felt more impressed, more attracted. Hephaistion never had felt like that; the more passionate Alexander was, the more Hephaistion felt alive. Hephaistion was someone calm and quiet but during his fight, something changed deep inside him.

He couldn't explain it but it had been powerful. He wanted to be better than he actually was. He had been surprised by Alexander's determination and passion; and he loved it.

Hephaistion decided he would remain the same way he was before with Alexander. There was something about the boy; maybe he was falling in love? Hephaistion pondered that he might be in love. But yet again, he thought he didn't know enough Alexander to be sure he could love him - and what was love after all?

Hephaistion finally fell asleep as he was trying to get answers.

The next few days, Alexander and Hephaistion passed a lot of time with each other. Alexander had asked for a revenge match against Hephaistion. Hephaistion beat him again.

But Alexander wasn't upset about it. He enjoyed his wrestling match with Hephaistion, because he learned a lot from it. But Hephaistion was still cold with him. It seemed no matter what he tried, Hephaistion refused to open up to him.

He couldn't reach Hephaistion's soul. Hephaistion, for reasons he didn't know, only allowed a distant, respectful relationship.

He started to hurt because he knew his heart belonged to Hephaistion and he needed him to open up to him.

Hephaistion refused to listen to his heart. Days passed and he was torn because with each minute he loved Alexander more and more. Alexander showed him greater signs of affection, but Hephaistion was so focused on not having his love confused with flattery, he preferred to shut his feelings down.

Hephaistion remembered how they were laying in the grass looking at the sky yesterday afternoon. "I can't believe it Hephaistion"

"What can't you believe Alexander?" Hephaistion asked.

It was a beautiful sunny day . Alexander looked up to the sky then he leaned closer to Hephaistion's face. Hephaistion's heart jumped. Alexander looked at Hephaistion's eyes then he whispered in Hephaistion's ear softly .

"Your eyes are more blue than the sky itself" Alexander's warm breathe sent shivers over Hephaistion.

Hephaistion froze at the sensation, he breathed deeply to take control of himself just as he noticed Alexander was about to take his hand in his. Hephaistion stoop up quickly.

"It's late, we'd better get back"

Alexander was stunned, he didn't expect this. It was the third attempt in two days he had made to his new friend and had always been turned down.

After dinner Alexander felt frustrated, angry and hurtMaybe Hephaistion didn't like him and was only polite to accept to wrestling and walking with him sometimes. He wondered, maybe the answer was as simple as that. Alexander laughed ironically. Everybody here was ready to love him. but the only one he wanted to love was deaf to his prayers.

Alexander was a fighter and no matter what, he didn't want to give up. He would open up to Hephaistion entirely, showing him all his secrets in the process. He had nothing to lose after all .Something in his heart kept telling him that Hephaistion belonged to him and it was their destiny to be together. Hephaistion was just not aware of it yet. Alexander felt so completely at peace, so alive with Hephaistion, he couldn't believe it could be unrequited.

Alexander thought of the beautiful smile Hephaistion shown him two days ago when he was able to break down his guard. They were wrestling again. Alexander had asked again for his revenge. Alexander felt he was beginning to handle Hephaistion's weight better, but as the great war strategist he would became, he had planned the night before - making his plan to force Hephaistion to surrender.

Suddenly he had spotted Hephaistion's stomach and with one of his hand was free, he immediately took the opportunity and began to tickle Hephaistion.

Hephaistion began to giggle, he wanted to stay serious, but it seemed Alexander had spotted a strategic sensitive point of his body. He couldn't stop giggling.

"This is no fair , Alexander! You are cheating! This isn't wrestling anymore" he said with difficulty, as he finally gave up. Alexander was finally on top and determinate to pursue the tickle fight.

Hephaistion had laughed and smiled like he never had before. Then he decided it was no fair and began to tickle Alexander in return. The two boys finally gave up their little special fight, both exhausted by laughter. They were panting. Hephaistion and Alexander looked at each other. Hephaistion wanted to kiss his new friend, hold him, but his reason reminded him of the rules of wrestling.

Alexander wanted more and he started to say "Hephaistion, I .." but Hephaistion stood up and interrupted him.

"This one doesn't count... tickling is not in any rule in the wrestling code."

"Oh come on, that was fun," said Alexander

"But unfair."

"Help me to stand up" Alexander asked.

Hephaistion looked at him. Suddenly not in the mood anymore. He wasn't Alexander's slave.

"You are big enough to do it yourself, or don't you have any strength left?"

Alexander looked at him. With anybody else than Hephaistion, Alexander would have been highly upset and annoyed. But he liked Hephaistion for his honestly.

The fact Hephaistion didn't put up with his sometimes spoiled attitude.

No way, Alexander could give up Hephaistion. They were too much alike, made from the same stone and yet shining a different way.

Alexander didn't want to give up. Maybe Hephaistion didn't like him and was only being polite to sometimes accept wrestling and walking with him. He wondered, maybe the answer was as simple as that. Alexander laughed ironically. Everybody here was ready to love him but the only one he wanted to love, and his beloved was deaf to his prayers.

Alexander was a fighter and no matter what, he didn't want to give up. He would open up to Hephaistion entirely, show him all of his secrets in the process. He had nothing to lose after all.

Alexander invited Hephaistion in his room. They sat on the bed.

"I want to show you something, Hephaistion" Alexander said nervously. He never shown this to anyone. It was like he was about to show his naked heart without any shield. His heart was beating faster, knowing, Hephaistion could break his heart in the next few minutes but he decided to give Hephaistion that power. He loved him enough, trusted him enough, to give Hephaistion the power of destroying him.

He opened a box as he said "You know how I love Achilles's story..." He started.

Hephaistion nodded, that was something hard to miss, each time Aristotle started to talk about Achilles, Alexander was adamant and always ready to defend Achilles no matter what. It was a sensitive subject for the boy. Hephaistion always wondered why? Then he thought he found the answer in the fact Achilles was simply his ancestor.

Alexander pulled a written paper from the box.

"I wrote it," he said "it's about Achilles and Patroclus". Alexander had never talked about his admiration for the love between Achilles and Patroclus until now.

Hephaistion nodded.

"I know the story" he said. Hephaistion didn't say it was one of his favourite stories, too, still fearing he would be taken for a flatterer.

Hephaistion read silently what Alexander had written. It was like a letter addressed to the lovers. It was powerful and well written. It showed Alexander's feelings about the men's love but not only that, this letter told about Alexander's fears and hopes. As he was talking to Achilles and Patroclus, as he said he hoped one day, he would find someone to love, like Achilles had found Patroclus.

Hephaistion was moved by the letter. What Alexander just made him read, was Alexander's soul and he fell more in love with Alexander. He didn't think it could have been possible.

Alexander was near him, anxious. Hephaistion had questioned himself a lot about Alexander's actions recently. He still did not know what Alexander expected from him.

It seemed Alexander really liked him, but then again, Alexander was everybody's friend. Plus, he was the Prince. Hephaistion looked at the letter again. This was Alexander's heart .

"So?" Finally asked an impatient Alexander.

"It's really beautifully done, well written; Aristotle will certainly be very proud of your work" he managed to say.

Alexander didn't like Hephaistion's practical opinion very much.

He took back the letter from Hephaistion's hand. He had a hard time holding back his tears.

"Why are you so cold with me Hephaistion? What did I do to you that was so wrong?" he yelled.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to upset you," Hephaistion said.

"You didn't upset me! You hurt me!" he replied. "You are always hurting me with your distant behaviour. Why are you so cold with me?"

Hephaistion was truly shocked by Alexander's words, the last thing he wanted was to hurt him.

He looked in Alexander's eyes. What a fool he had been. How at this moment he loved Alexander, who was not afraid to display his feelings, to ask him those questions, with a such fire. A fire was warming Hephaistion's calm heart and that same passion reached his heart as he said suddenly

"I'm sorry. The truth is, I care about you more than I should. I never wanted you to think I would be kind to you and love you simply because you are my prince, and one day my king. Because it's not true. Most people could sacrifice their lives for you because it is their duty, because you are their prince... Of course I will do that, too, but not because of what you are! I would sacrifice my life because it's you I Love. You, my Alexander."

Hephaistion had finally decided to open himself. Like Alexander had done.As Hephaistion realised what he had done it was too late. Alexander was already staring at him lovingly.

Alexander's heart was touched by what Hephaistion told him. The only reason Hephaistion had been cold, was because he didn't want Alexander thinking he liked him because he was the prince.

Hephaistion's love was pure and only directed at him. He said he would die for Alexander, not Alexander the prince. He would die because of his love, not because of his duty. Never had Alexander expected this, it was beyond all his dreams.

Alexander had never felt so loved. Alexander came closer to Hephaiston and smiled tenderly at his beloved.

"Sometimes Hephaistion, it's better to listen to your heart." After hearing Alexander's advice, Hephaistion held him tenderly.

They felt so loved and so comfortable in each other's arms. Their hearts were beating at the same rhythm. They had never felt so complete.

They stayed like that for a few minutes, just enjoying having the other close.

They finally broke the embrace. Alexander took Hephaistion's hand in his.

"I think I need to write another letter to Achilles and Patroclus! I need to tell them, I finally found that someone to love, that I found my Patroclus," said Alexander as he put his other hand on Hephaistion's cheek tenderly.

"Yes, it's a great idea, My Achilles," Hephaistion said as he leaned closer to Alexander and reached his lips.

end


End file.
